First Round of Chemo is DONE!

Hello everyone! 

It's been awhile and I apologize for that, but I just did not have the energy to write a blog until now. Its been VERY hectic since my first round of chemo, but I have made it through and now I am ready to share and tell you guys all about it :) So here we goooo

I was admitted to the hospital on Tuesday morning, which was the day I started chemo. The day before, I had done some kidney testing as outpatient to make sure my kidneys were functioning well enough to handle the chemo treatment. My kidneys looked great and it was time to start chemo. Going in I was pretty nervous, but somehow the day I got admitted, I didn't feel as nervous anymore. It was like all the anxiety leading up to it had disappeared! I almost felt ready to just get started. Its weird to say it, but somehow it just felt that way.

The nurses were super nice and made both Ryan and I feel very comfortable starting chemo. Or as comfortable as we could be at least. Thankfully Ryan was allowed to stay with me during the day, but he had to stay overnight at the hotel, which was only about 1 minute walk away from the hospital. This made it super easy for us to get through this together. Thankfully, I actually ended up being able to leave late at night and stay with Ryan at the hotel before starting the next day of chemo!! So amazing!! 

The first three days (the length of my chemo), were challenging physically and mentally, but my health seemed to be holding up pretty good! Nausea and low appetite was for sure there, but I would say I have gotten pretty used to those symptoms by now haha! I felt a little bit weak as well, but I tried to do little walks in the hallway to keep myself moving. 

During this time we learned so much about chemo! There was so much that we didn't know and probably still don't know. For example, you gain so much fluids into your body that you gain a lot of weight! And pee A LOT! Like wow! I was peeing every 40 minutes! And yes, I have to measure how much I pee every time so the nurses can keep track of how much fluid I am releasing vs. how much I have received through fluids and chemo. Then they compare the numbers and give you medication to go pee even more if needed. So yeah! it feels like a full time work! 

Going into chemo, I really didn't know what to expect and neither did I feel like I got concrete answers from doctors and nurses when I tried to ask them. I guess the reason is that it's so individualized. So far for me personally things have been quite rough! I am not sure if it's worse than I expected or better, but at least it's been pretty hard! 

It all started the night I finished my first round of chemo, Thursday night. Both my sister and brother came to the hotel where Ryan and I had been staying to visit! I was feeling pretty sick, but not too bad. It was super nice to see them and have them over for a little bit. While they were visiting and gradually started feeling worse and they decide to go home so I can get some rest. Couple of hours later, I was very, very sick and Ryan and I decided to bring me back to my floor at the hospital to get help. I was admitted that night. Poor Ryan had to go back to the hotel and stay there. This was the start of many unfortunate events in the coming weeks. You're about to see how hectic it got. 

The next day, Ryan and my sister came to the hospital to see me, but my sister was told that she wasn't allowed to see me at all. However, Ryan was since he had been with me the whole week. I was still feeling pretty sick and I vomited a couple of times. Around mid-day the nurse asked if they had taken a Covid test of me recently and I told them yes, when I first came to the hospital and it was negative. They ended up taking a new one, which was in fact POSITIVE! UGH! COVID now, on top of everything else?! No freakin way!! That was my first thought! and also, where in the world did I get that from?! My family, Ryan and I had been extremely careful with mask use and everything due to my health, but somehow now I had it. We think I must have gotten it at the hospital unfortunately, but we will never know. Later that day I was very, very sick and pretty much the next 24 hours were a blur. I didn't even open my eyes the whole time. Ryan and I got put into an isolation room at the hospital and we weren't allowed to leave at all. The hospital was very busy too so getting someone to bring us food or medication usually took at least an hour. It was very frustrating! and we felt so helpless stuck in that room. 

They took a blood test of me to make sure I had the antibodies to fight off Covid. However, we were told the next day that they had lost my blood sample and forgot to deliver it once they found it. They told us we may need to stay in isolation for another 24 hours... Like WHAT?! Eventually, they found my blood sample and processed it the same day! when they got the confirmation that those were good, I was allowed to go home. Thankfully I was starting to feel a little bit better and was ready to go home. 

My sister drove Ryan and I home to Lillehammer. It felt very nice to come home :) The next few days I was feeling up and down physically. Some days were worse than others. Nausea was at first my biggest issue, which then switched into nausea and pain and then mostly pain. I have been having some sever pain in my pelvis due to an immune booster they gave me 24 hours after finishing treatment. The pain is from white blood cells building up in my bone marrow, which causes pressure and pain. OH MY it has been so extremely painful! (Like the worst pain I've every felt!)  Causing me to vomit of pain multiple times. I have been using a heat pack that my parents bought though and that has been pretty helpful. 

Medications. 

It really is taking some time for me to adjust taking so many meds. Thankfully Ryan is very on top of it and helps be stay on track with those! The worst part is just that I don't tolerate strong pain meds!! So that's been a challenge. It's like I have to choose between pain or feeling nauseous/vomit. But we have slowly been figuring out a descent balance. The nausea medication has helped a lot! 

Over to something more fun! 

THE DOGS ARE HERE!! My amazing friend Georgia brought our dogs to Norway last week and it feels absolutely amazing having them here! My heart is so full and it helps a lot mentally and emotionally having them here with us! Thanks again to everyone that has helped us with the dogs. We are so extremely thankful. The dogs got their pet passports and can officially travel from Europe to the US much easier now. 

Also Georgia and Li stayed in Norway for about a week and it was so amazing to have them here! It was great to laugh, go on walks, and live life as normal as possible! It was MUCH needed! We took them to Hafjell and showed them where Ryan and I got engaged, and had lots of fun while they were here. It really recharged me and I'm so thankful they came!  

Lots of other bad news! 

After I got Covid, my sister ended up testing positive and then Ryan about 5 days after me. From there, my parents ended up getting Covid as well (none of us have ever had it before). If there was a time to get it, we think it was best it was at the beginning of my treatment and not round 5 or 6 when my immune system is really shot. All of us tolerated Covid differently, it was certainly a challenge trying to recover from chemo with Covid and then also have Ryan try to take care of me when he had Covid and wasn't feeling well himself. After about 5 days, Ryan was much better. 

However, I wasn't doing so well! I was admitted back to the hospital on Tuesday March 1st due to sever pain and vomiting. It was a crazy and scary episode and it was even more hard because the day our car was in the shop getting repairs, Ryan didn't have a car to take me to the hospital. We had to call the ambulance. After hours in the emergency room, they admitted me and began to do more tests. They have done a few ultrasounds, an X-Ray and one MRI. 

They have been taking great care of me at the hospital. While I was in the hospital, my hair decided it didn't want to wait until the weekend... It was falling out in chunks!! My hair was everywhereeeee! So, the hospital let me go home for the day/night to have a GOODBYE HAIR PARTY!! Yay!!  Which was so much fun! Ryan and my brother set up for the party and my mom made homemade pizza and desert! 

I really wanted it to be a fun transition to a brand new me! I had family and friends on zoom and while everyone was on, we took a toast, and they watched Ryan and I cut each others hair. There was champagne, treats, pizza, balloons, etc. we went all out and I couldn't be happier about it. From day 1 Ryan said he would shave his head with me so I wouldn't be alone. I'm so thankful for his support and his love! It has been a huge help through all of this. He has been working so hard to make this easier on me and I'm so thankful for him. 

Unfortunately things took a turn again, after the party that night, Ryan had to bring me back to the hospital around 1:30am because I was in so much pain. It's honestly the worst. I can never get a break... But I went back up to my floor and they helped out out right away! After a few more tests the next day, they sent me back home. But thankfully, they will let me go back to my floor right away if I need at any time. The same day I came home, we found out our car that we bought is totaled... After getting it back from the shop, Ryan was driving away and it just died on him. They then found out the engine needs to be replaced. So we decided we weren't going to put anymore money into it. So we are also on the hunt for a new and reliable vehicle. oh the events that seem never ending... welcome to our life... haha 

Some positive news! 

We are changing some things up! For the better! Ryan and I bought some plants to brighten up our space and he also bought some bright and happy comforters for our room! This is called our sunshine/happy room! A place I can go that feels warm, welcoming, and stress free. We are also moving away from the word chemo because it has a negative meaning behind it and it brings lots of anxiety (especially after my first round... oof). So we are calling it Liquid Sunshine :) Liquid Sunshine because it's offering me another chance at life, and it's helping me get better even if it's hard to see at times. So cheers to the next couple of days before my next round of Liquid Sunshine! I have hope that the next round is going to be a lot better :) 

Sorry again that this post is so long! I haven't been healthy enough to write so you're getting a few weeks of information in one post haha... but hope you enjoyed the read. 

Thank you all for your messages, your love and support! 

Have an amazing day, 

-Maria